Growing Pains

Bittersweet Milestones seem to be the theme of our family lately. We have recently experienced our youngest son leaving for boot camp and our youngest daughter turning 18. In the spring we will have our last high school student graduate and another wedding. Joshua moved in with Grandma Kate and we are down to one child at home. I have already made the comment to the kids that it seems like way too much change at one time but no matter what I say life just keeps moving along!

We (grandma Kate and I) dropped Michael off at the Military Processing Center last week. I was so proud to watch him swear in. We stayed as long as we could and I managed to leave him there without crying all the way home. He called home yesterday and I could not hold back the tears any longer. He is doing well and anxious to get started as he has spent the last week at the processing center in Columbus. He joins his unit today and from what I understand we will not be hearing from him for about three weeks. He has had my heart from the beginning and understood very early on that I was wrapped around his finger. Of course it has never hurt that he reminds me so much of his father. I have been told I will not recognize the young man who comes home to us.

Katie is now 18 and we no longer have any minors in our home. She is still and will always be my baby girl but I cannot deny that she has become a beautiful young woman while my back was turned for just a few minutes. She continues to be a joy to me. I tell her all the time she is the icing on my cake. I love the way she cares for others and for her desire to follow God even when it is not popular or easy. With the gifts God has given her I look forward to seeing what He calls her to do.

The plans for Matt and Ashley's wedding are moving along. If we had been practicing arranged marriages I could not have done a better job. Ashley is everything I ever hoped for in a daughter in law and her family and the way I feel about them is just an added bonus. They, or course are very anxious for the nuptials to get here. I am just enjoying the whole process and so very proud of the choices they are making and the way they handle themselves.

Josh has made the move across the street to grandma's house. I don't know which one of them is more excited about the arrangement. Grandma has retired but has already found activities to fill her days but her evenings are less lonely now with Josh there. He continues to pursue his music with his band Prideless and is still working at O2B kids. So grateful for the relationship the two of them have.

In the midst of all this change I am grateful for my husband who continues to show me what it means to be blessed with the gift of unconditional and steadfast love.

Examples...

These last few days I have been thinking about how blessed I have been in my life to have wonderful women who have taught me to be a friend, wife and a mother.

My grandma Smith was a hard worker and she never complained. She was usually the first one up and had breakfast on before we had our eyes open. She loved taking care of her family. She was a wonderful hostess and somehow she knew what you needed before you even knew it yourself. I asked her once how she managed to fill everyone's glass with tea before we realized it was even empty and she said "She always listened for the ice". Oh to be so in tune with the needs of those I love.

My grandma Bishop was also a hard worker but her body wore out before it was time for her to go. She must have found it hard to be bedridden at a time in her life when her friends were taking trips and enjoying a time in their lives when they had less responsibility. She never let on if that was the case though. She was content with her situation and found a reason to smile everyday. Oh how I hope I will be able to accept the limitations of age with the same grace I saw in her.

My mom has taught me that being a mother is more about being there through the good and the bad than it is about carrying a child for nine months. She has loved me unconditionally since the very beginning when a skinny five year old child came to live with her. I hope my children will always know the security of my unconditional love.

Yesterday a woman that I had the privilege of calling MillieMom passed away and I've been thinking a lot about her and all the many things she was good at. I remember especially the day that I realized that I would be a lot smarter if I listened more closely to the advise she gave. She was committed to her husband and her family. She loved the sound of the family playing games together and taught me how to play cards and bunco. She was my google before we had computers and would answer my silly questions, even long distance. She never met a stranger and adopted those around her into her family. She was a wonderful mom, wife and grandma and has left behind a wonderful legacy in those who loved her. I am grateful for the place she had in my life and pray I will be able to remember and use all the life lessons she taught me.

Emptier Nest

We had a houseful a few nights ago and I loved it. There is nothing like the sound of teenagers laughing and just enjoying being together. It made me realize how much I miss having a full house. When Mike and I married we had six in the house and one across the street, and one across town. Now we have three in the house, one across the country, two married with families of their own one in Orlando going to school, and one who doesn't stay in one place too long! I know this is a natural progression and I really wouldn't want anything less for them, than for them to make their own lives and follow their dreams but I have to admit I miss having them all home at once.

I wonder if it will ever get easier? I think I am beginning to understand why my Grandma was so happy at Easter when all the kids made it home to the farm. It is comforting to have everyone together.

Is it too soon to recommend that we have family reunions?

18/365 My Handyman

We got a new fridge and it is much bigger than the old one. No Problem! My husband can fix anything and I am so grateful that he is able and willing even after a long day at work. You would think we would be downsizing but our family seems to be growing. I can't even imagine what it will be like when all the kids are married and have children. We are blessed beyond measure!

1/365 Traditions

We celebrated today with a very traditional New Years Day meal. Collard greens, black-eyed peas and rice, cornbread and a pork roast. For a little while my house smelled just like my grandmas did when I was a child. Traditions are important to me. They remind me of years past and connect me to wonderful memories of family and friends who are no longer here. I hope my children will be able to recall memories from their childhood as they carry on the traditions with their families and create memories for their children. The connections to our past are precious and help us to make sense of the present.

So many things to be thankful for....

It has been such an amazing year that I really don't even know where to start. I am thankful to all who supported me in realizing my dream of graduating form UNF. I know that I could not have done it without my family and friends who encouraged me along the way. We had two high school graduates in the family, Josh and Jenny. It was an exciting time to see them reach that milestone. I am grateful for the blessing of my children. They all fill my life with joy. We had a new addition to the family with the birth of our grandson Landen. He is my sunshine. We have had so much fun with him these last six months. Amanda's husband Steve will be coming home soon and we can't wait (especially Amanda, she has been such a trooper). I am so glad that he is part of our family. Jenny had an exciting year as she and her boyfriend Josh are engaged and planning to be married in April. Josh is still making music and leading the youth worship at Fleming Island Christ Church. Katie has had a good year following in the tradition of her brothers and marching in the band. Michael is looking forward to graduating in the Spring and going into the Navy (I think that is the service he is looking at this week ;). Chris has made his way from Alabama to California and seems to like the west coast. He has a job and seems to be content. I just wish it wasn't so far away. Shawn has also made his way to California and I am not sure we will ever get either one of them back on the east coast. I am thankful there are finding there own way but I sure do miss them. Matt is finally enjoying the college scene at UCF. He and Ashley rushed a Christian Fraternity and Sorority and they have been extremely busy. My brother Adam is finally getting married and I am so excited for him and Scarlett. She is a wonderful addition to our family (and she is a seminole too). Dad and Anita are enjoying the fellowship of their church and as usual blessing everyone with their generosity. I am grateful for their new life in Christ. Mom is still working. I am beginning to think she will never retire and just take it easy. I am thankful she has a job she loves and that she is across the street when I need her. Mike and I are doing great. What a precious gift he has been to me. He is working at CVS in the pharmacy and looking forward to the day I have a paying job and he can go to school. I am in the FSU School of Social Work graduate program and I am thoroughly enjoying it. Of course I don't like doing the papers but I am learning so much and have made wonderful friends. I am currently interning at YCC (Youth Crisis Center) as part of my program. I am a therapist intern working with youth who have been placed in the residential program. The goal is to help the youth and family get through the current crisis and connect them with services. I will finish my internship at the end of December or the beginning of January. This has been a wonderful opportunity for me to see what it is like to work with youth at risk and I am even more certain this is where I want to be.

We have close family friends who have been tested this year and I am grateful for a God who is faithful to them. I am so thankful that God spared Mr. Gould so that we can enjoy him and his friendship for many, many (many etc.) years to come. Mrs. Gould finally has a job where countless children will be blessed by her talents. My sister in Christ Meryl has been through a horrible tragedy and God has been there for her all along. Her strength and faith have been a source of encouragement to me of God's faithfulness.

I am overwhelmed at how God provides for my family and friends and can't wait to see what He has in store for us next year. Because I know:

Roman 8:38-39 For I am convinced that neither death nor life, neither angels nor demons, neither the present nor the future, nor any powers, neither height nor depth, nor anything else in all creation , will be able to separate us from the love of God that is is Christ Jesus our Lord. NIV

Fall Fun 2008

We finally got around to carving the pumpkins. Katie decided she wanted a "Jack Skeleton". I think it turned out really good. The pumpkins were not easy to carve especially if detail was required so Mike got out the drill and we did pumpkin surgery. We didn't get around to roasting the seeds yet, but we will.

Smith Family Reunion

We had a great time this past weekend at the Family Reunion. I appreciate my Aunt Berlene and her efforts to make sure we all get together at least once a year. I want my kids to know the importance of our extended family. It is fun to watch the younger cousins trying to keep up with their "young uns" It brings back memories of trying to keep up with mine. It reminds us of the wonderful heritage we have been blessed with. I am grateful for aunts and uncle that have loved me unconditionally throughout the years and cousins who were the siblings I did not have. The best thing is to know there will be another reunion one day where we will all be together again and those who have gone on ahead will be with us once more.

The Last Concert

When my oldest son joined the band program at Green Cove Springs Junior High in 1998 I had no idea what to expect. I didn't know that it would become a big part of our entire family's life. Band is so much more than playing instruments together. Band is a lifestyle. I am grateful for Mrs. Mayer and her willingness to share her love of music with my children.She has encouraged them and given them a gift they will have for the rest of their lives. Band trips, competitions, football games and concerts are all a big part of our memories. What Chris began 10 years ago, Katie finished up tonight, so there will be no more "pickle suits" for us but our love for the cougar band and Mrs. Mayer will never end.

Three Amazing Women

I meant to post this Mother's Day but somehow I didn't get around to it.

I have been blessed with many wonderful women in my life who taught by example how to be a Godly woman. There were three women though, who were especially important.

Many of even my closest friends do not realize that my mom Kate did not actually give birth to me. She married my dad when I was five and instantly became mom. She only had three months of marriage before I came to live with them full time. I was malnourished, unruly and very insecure. From the very beginning I was her child without question. I worked in the same doctors' office with her for a while and we would laugh when the patients would recall her pregnancy with me. Mom is still working full time and I wonder sometimes if she will ever retire. She loves what she does and she is good at it. I learned the gift of unconditional love from my mom and how important it is to find your calling and pursue it.

My grandma Bishop was Kate's mom. One of my favorite childhood memories is going to her house for dinner. She made the best chicken and dumplings ever. My grandma was bedridden at a relatively early age because her bones were so brittle. I had the opportunity to take care of her when my family with our two young boys moved into her home. We had so much fun. It was not always easy but she had the best attitude. I had a third son while we were living there and he was her pride and joy. There were many days when I would lay him in her arms and she would sing him to sleep so I could get something done. From my grandma Bishop I learned the blessing of a joyful spirit that was not dependent on circumstances.

My grandma Smith was a farmer's wife. It was a hard life but she never complained. I spent my summers on the farm when I was growing up. Grandma had a full spread breakfast when we woke up every morning. When we came in from the fields for dinner she had a full spread again. It was not uncommon for people to drop in when it was time to eat. Grandma never seemed to mind, she would just add a plate. She very rarely ate when we did. She was too busy making sure we all had everything we needed. We used to joke that grandma knew our glass was empty before we did. I asked her once about it and she said she listened for the ice! I learned the gift of hospitality from my grandma Smith and the value of working hard for those we love.

I hope that I will be able to pass these gifts on to my children so that the legacy will continue.